Berkley Center

Background: Sister Lydia Okang'a, a Kenyan Catholic sister, has focused over many years on communications, especially on finding ways to tell the stories of women working for good. She spoke by zoom with Katherine Marshall on April 17, 2025, recounting her life journey that has taken her from a patriarchal community in western Kenya to joining a religious congregation, the Sisters of Mary of Kakamega (SMK), to a sharp focus on communications. She pays tribute to the strength of her mother in setting her on her path and reflects on her optimistic sense that things are changing, bringing more respect for what women can do. Sister Okang'a joined her congregation shortly after finishing high school and later earned bachelor’s and master’s degrees in communication. As a teacher and program leader she has focused sharply on improving the lives of women and girls. She recalls the powerful force of a traditional metaphor for challenges that women face: like a frog, women must jump when needed and find the most effective place and role. Looking ahead, she highlights the power of social media today and the importance of thoughtful communication to help shift narratives towards more equal roles for women and men and a more just society.

"Like a frog, women must jump when needed and find the most effective place and role.”

Bio: Sister Lydia Okang'a, SMK, is affiliated with the Sisters of Mary of Kakamega, and she is part of Georgetown University’s Women Faith Leaders Fellowship 2024-2025 cohort. Okang'a was born and grew up in Kakamega County, Western Kenya, in a family that had only girls, raised by a widowed mother, in a patriarchal society. Inspired by her mother’s courage, she learned resilience and as a teenager trained young ones in liturgical dance. After her religious profession in the religious congregation of Sisters of Mary of Kakamega, Sr. Okang'a served as a teacher at St. Aloys Primary School, Ojolla, and later as an acting administrator at St. Mary’s Girls High School, Webuye, where she served as a role model for the girls. As a communications coordinator for the Catholic Diocese of Kakamega, she mentored many young women, especially university students who sought her counsel. While pursuing a master's degree in communication, she wrote blogs for the Network of Catholic Sisters Communicators (NCSC) – currently Communication Network for Catholic Sisters (CNCS-Kenya), sharing stories of girls facing injustices. Sister Lydia’s passion to empower girls and women focuses on those who have endured hardships, including widows and orphans.

Can you begin with telling us where you came from and how you came to your current roles, as a sister and a communicator?

I was born in the western part of Kenya, part of a girls only family (I have three sisters). I come from a community where the boy child is favored, and the girl child is held back. In my community, they consider boys as heirs to their family property, while girls are supposed to just find their way.
There is a terminology used to refer to girls: they used to call us frogs, because a frog has to find a way of surviving either in the water or on land, when and where conditions are favorable. As a frog, you must jump here and there.

That's the kind of community I came from. I was my dad’s first born, and my mom tells me that when I was born, my father was very excited to have me. He didn't mind that I was a girl. He was excited because he was looking for a baby and he found one, so he considered me as an heir to the family.
To cut the long story short, when I was becoming a teenager, just 13, my father passed on. We were left with relatives who only looked at us as people who had no rights to own property, looking at our land and thinking maybe it was an opportunity to take land and other property. But I thank God I had a very strong mother and she stood firm. She had to fight many fights, because she had given birth to girls only and had no boy to consider as the heir. She worked hard to ensure that we went to school. Thus my sisters and I were empowered to become at least somebody in the society.

How did you come to decide to be a sister?

While I was growing up, my mother was a casual worker with a group of sisters, and that way I got to know about them and their work. Although I had no chance to meet them in person, we used to discuss them among my siblings. The second born used to say she would join a convent. I was much younger and not focused on a convent, but my sister changed her ambitions and began to suggest that it was I who should join the convent and represent the family. While I was growing up, my mother would take us to events where religious sisters made their professions, or to ordinations in neighboring parishes, and I enjoyed these colorful celebrations. There was something fascinating about the sisters and particularly the Sisters of Mary. They were very welcoming: they welcomed us to their house and celebration and fed us, even though we were a large family and they did not really know us. I was like, “wow, these women must be so kind.” One of my sisters was a beneficiary as a sister supported her through her high school. My mom struggled as she had little money, so the sister looked for someone to support my sister. So that is the kind of image I had of sisters: people who are supportive, people who are there for you, and I began to develop an interest in joining the sisterhood.

What were the highlights of your journey to become a sister?

I applied to three different congregations. I tried the Mill Hill Sisters, because they would hold seminars in my parish, but I was not really drawn there. I also applied to the Benedictine Sisters of Grace and Compassion, but I was still not drawn to join them. I think I was just waiting for the right time. I loved the Sisters of Mary, and I felt like this was where I wanted to be, but I didn't have a link with them. One day it happened that my mother had gone to a market near one of their convents and she met a sister who came from my parish: Sister Leonidah. She gave my mother the address of the Sisters of Mary, the congregation I really wished to join. When my mother came back home and gave me this address, I was so excited, and I didn't hesitate to apply. After some time, I was invited for a Come and See, where you just go and spend some time with their sisters, and see the way they live, the way they do things; after that you go back home and make up your mind. I went with others, about 22 girls from different dioceses of Kenya. Later we spent another week with the sisters, who taught us many things about the Sisters of Mary. I felt “yes”; I was interested. This was around August. In October, those of us who wished to join the Sisters of Mary were invited for interviews. There were both oral and written interviews. I remember that at that time I was not so exposed, I was rather naïve. They asked questions like “who is the Bishop of Kisumu diocese” (a neighboring diocese to Kakamega), but I didn't know. But I think I answered the questions well and they felt that they could nurture this girl and she could be somebody. I was given a letter inviting me to join.

We were supposed to join the following year, but were told to join earlier (the congregation was preparing for a chapter so the sisters would be busy). We joined at the end of November and began our spiritual journey. I went to a place in western Kenya known as Mukumu to start our aspirancy; after six months we were told we were going to join the aspirants in the neighboring country, Uganda. This came as a surprise as I was not expecting to go out of my country then, but being a religious, you are a missionary, and you must always be prepared. Around July, we were taken to Uganda and joined other aspirants who were there, for about six months. The next stage, postulancy, also lasted a year, back in Kenya. After every year an evaluation is done about you, so your colleagues will evaluate you and you evaluate yourself, and a decision is made whether, based on your behavior, you are going the right or the wrong direction. If they feel you are headed in the right direction, they give you an opportunity to continue. We finished our postulancy, and then we moved to Shimalabandu where the SMK novitiate is located.

The two-year novitiate came next. The first year we were indoors, because you pray more during the first year and reflect on your life, preparing to make a serious life step. Your movements are limited. During the second year of novitiate you move around communities, staying with sisters for about two months, to experience life in the community. It’s a way of making up your mind as to whether this really is what you want.

During that year, we went to Uganda for an experience in one community. I worked there in a baby home. It was a remarkable experience working with those babies. Some had been thrown away and some were brought there because their parents died while they were giving birth to them, or for other reasons. The second experience was in another community, working in a girls’ primary school. My work was basically to help the girls in the boarding section, supporting with little errands like teaching them liturgy and other things. It was a very nice moment.

At the end of the year, we made our first profession as religious sisters. I was then appointed to a community, in Nyanza in western Kenya, in Kisumu Archdiocese, working at a primary school as a teacher. I had not trained as a teacher, as I joined immediately after my high school, but was sent to work there: when you were sent, you go. I had a nice experience working there, with the girls. I would advise them and was just to be a role model to them. After about nine months, I was transferred to another school, a girls’ high school, St. Mary’s, in Webuye, still in western Kenya, but at the extreme end from where I was before. I advised the girls and they came to me for advice. I have been able to follow them later and see that they have made it in life, achieving their dreams, drawing on advice I had given them. A simple word of advice made a difference.

And then after three years (in 2013 now) I came to the university to pursue studies in communications. I was a full-time student until I graduated in 2017.

What encouraged you to pursue communications?

I had always loved creative writing and stuff like that, even in primary and high school. My teachers then were impressed by my compositions and would read my stories to others in the classroom. I felt this was something I wanted to do.

What did you do when you graduated?

I was sent to work in the Diocese of Kakamega as the diocesan coordinator of communications. It was a small, new office at first, and I was the pioneer in the diocese. I didn't have much experience, but I tried my level best. I was very much into social media and I decided that at least I could make that diocese visible. I would do stories about the diocese and post them on social media pages, which I set up during that time.

I worked there for about two years, from late 2017 until July 2019, when I had the opportunity to pursue my master's degree, still in communication. I did media studies and corporate communications, as a full-time student. But I volunteered at the same time, where something needed my attention.

In 2020, when COVID was just striking, the bishops decided that we needed to focus on communications, and they were looking for volunteers at the Super ETV station. I decided to take one segment, doing a story on the “Saint of the Day.” I would do a short video and share it with them. The videos were shown on TV. The program ended when COVID was over, maybe because funds ran out.

Towards the end of 2022, I was part of a team project known as the Network of Catholic Sister Communicators, telling the stories of Catholic sisters who are doing unique things in society. I was the social media manager, setting up the social media pages for the network. It has advanced, and they now call themselves the Communication Network for Catholic Sisters, an established organization. I feel proud to have been part of that initiative.

After my graduation in 2023, I had the opportunity to work with the Loyola Center for Media and Communication. The Association of Religious sisters in Uganda has a formation program; we tell the stories of people who have gone through that formation program and are now working, experiencing life after their formation. I've been able to engage with religious sisters and women

Where are you based now? And your current focus?

I'm based in Nairobi, Kenya. I do communications with my order. In 2023, I was asked to run my congregation’s website and its social media. But I've been doing the communication for us all along. At first it was my diocese, then the congregation overall. I cover all the different events. I just used my phone; I had the skills but no camera, so the quality is not perfect but at least it's something that goes out there. It touches people. But there was more to do, and I wanted to go further, beyond just the events, to do stories about religious sisters in different institutions, and not just within the Church, but things that sisters do outside of the Church. In my congregation, we have many schools, hospitals, and other kinds of institutions. That’s something I am now pursuing: to go out and tell the stories of what the sisters are doing.

You have focused for many years now on social media. Which are the platforms that are most influential, and which do you think are most constructive? With everyone talking about AI and the dangers of social media, what is your experience?

Today we have AI and social media everywhere, for everything. It's like nobody can do anything without AI. You can't avoid it. I have personally had experience with YouTube and Facebook, which reaches very many people. X is very powerful. Not everybody's on X, but some people are there, and it has a lot of influence. And then of course we have LinkedIn, which connects a lot of people. On platforms like YouTube and LinkedIn you will meet people who encourage you, but you'll also meet people who are very cruel. If you decide to be on those social media platforms, you need to develop a thick skin.

Today we also have blogs, which I'm very much interested in. I'm developing a website that will have the blog section and the video sections and stuff so that I'll be able to tell stories that empower women into careers.

Whose website will that be?

I'm just setting up a website where I'll be able to tell the stories I develop, stories of the congregation and beyond.

Are you optimistic about social media for Kenya or do you see more dangers?

I am optimistic. Kenya is a country that has really embraced social media. It seems like almost everybody is on those platforms. Today many young people are on the TikTok platform. We have Facebook, of course. Many Kenyans are on those social media platforms, and it is a powerful way to reach many people with your message.

How do you see the Church in Kenya, the bishops and so forth, using social media? Are they positive about it? How do they use it? Is it a question of age, with younger people more active?

Some of the bishops are very active when it comes to social media, like Archbishop Muheria of Nyeri Archdiocese. You'll always see him there posting things, even on WhatsApp, and he’s very positive about communications. The bishops have their social media platforms, where they post their stories, press releases, and so forth. It is something they really support, with only a few who do not. A majority have adopted social media.

What about sisters? Are they the same or different?

Most of the younger generation of sisters have embraced the social media platforms. Some who are very elderly and were not born during that digital age might be a little bit reserved in terms of using them. Some of them might see it as an evil thing or something that is too secular for religious people. But a majority have come to accept that this is a reality that is here to stay, that we can't run away from it. We have just to learn how to live with it. Instead of telling the younger ones not to be on social media, they tell you to be on social media, but to use it wisely, in a way that promotes values and does not scandalize people.

What are some of the stories that you have found most inspiring or exciting that you've told of sisters?

We have sisters in the network of Catholic sisters who have sacrificed their time and their little resources just to support young girls or young boys who are struggling. For example, some are rejected in society because they have a disability. The sisters come and ask what they are able to do to support them. One story I remember that we told was about the Assumption sisters of Nairobi who are running the Limuru Cheshire Home for children. Most of them are girls with a mental disability, so when it comes to class, they are not able to understand a lot of things. The sisters decided to help them learn hand work, which was something they could do very well. Thus, they were empowering them in small ways, doing small things to support them, so that at least they are self independent in the community and not just relying on others.

I've found sisters who have empowered girls through their formal education, with support to girls from poor backgrounds. The sisters see some who don't have resources and find ways to adjust and support them through high school. That is because they know that if they support them with education, in the long run they will be able to be economically empowered; they meet with people of like minds and they are able to open their minds and think just beyond the perpetrators who hold them back.

You began our conversation talking about coming from a community that favored boys. I love your story of the frogs: that girls have to jump and find their own way. Is that something you see changing? Does it vary by ethnic group? How do you see the situation for girls in Kenya today?

I think in Kenya today, the narrative is changing. When you walk around, even in Nairobi, you meet a number of women out there who are so powerful, and you know that they have a say in society. Even today when you go back to the villages, it is the women who are supporting their parents: the girl child. The boys that they valued so much don't even remember that their parents are there, maybe because they felt they were so entitled, they don't care. But most of the girls who have been empowered have been able to do great things, even just in their communities. So I feel that we are in a place where the woman and the girl child matter in society. That’s true even in homes where we both parents are present, but even more in a home where the father has died. You realize that when the mother lives a long time, she is able to sustain the family throughout. If, however, the mother dies, it becomes a disaster and even if the father remarries the home falls apart. So I feel that women are very powerful in society and, if they are empowered, they are able to do great things. We are in that place where men have begun to respect women, and accept that yes, they are girls, but they can do something.

Just take my family's story. Many families in my community had boys, but when you look at their homes and their bragging about their boys, life can be miserable. In August, we had the memorial Mass for my Dad, and some came to my mother’s home and said how much they admired the way this woman had taken care of the home. It actually looks better than the homes of many others. So, they recognized that women can still do something in society. So they are not despised as much as they were despised in days gone by. They know that women are able at least to do something in society if they are empowered.

So you think things are changing. Is that true everywhere. You've spent time in different communities, you've been in Uganda and so forth. Is the situation very different from place to place, or is it a general trend?

There are large differences. In urban settings, the narrative I think has changed totally. But when you go deep in the villages, there are those people who are still stuck to old mindsets, for example that a woman cannot tell me anything. There are people who are conservative, stuck in the traditional framework of a patriarchal society. There a woman doesn't have much say. In some communities, in northern Kenya for example, you'll find that the woman really doesn't have much say. The men have to decide for them even when they should have the chance to make their own decisions. Just because they are men, they own the society and they make decisions for girls, whether they decisions benefit them or not. Thus there are still places where the men are still stuck with their ideologies of men being more powerful than women. But many communities that have moved on.

What are you hoping to do with your capstone project for the Women Faith Leaders Fellowship (WFLP)?

I'll be telling stories of sisters who are running institutions that are supporting the girl child. I'm doing blogs or rather feature stories about some of these institutions. I hope I'll be able to do many stories, at least before the end of May.

Could you tell me about any you've done already?

I've done one so far, and I hope to do three this weekend. One is a technical school or rather vocational school another is a high school, and the third is an institution hosting nursing students. I'm looking forward to doing so many stories, not just of women religious but people who are maybe going through a lot and that need support. Telling their story might, touch someone and they might come out to support maybe just by a word of advice or by some resources.

You spoke several times about changing the narrative. We know how important that is, but also how difficult, because there are so many voices. How do you see that going forward?

We need to find ways to use the power of communication. Writing and podcasts seem to strike people, but you need different ways to communicate with different people. Different people are moved by different things. There are those who are into writing, then there are those who want to see the pictures. There are those who want to watch a video and then those who just want to listen. I think it's a great way to have that diversity. I already have YouTube and social media platforms. I think they will help. When I tell a story, I just don't tell it in form of a blog, but also in video and other forms of stories.